The Goon Squad is Coming for You...Fashion

I think the entire Fashion industry is full of men who think women are retarded. I know that the fashion industry is actually many foot soldiers in the Ultimate gay man army, woman who are artistic, and LOTS of girls who are walking a few steps before passing out from lack of food, or smoking their calories. I say this because I found myself looking for a simple skirt, A nice handbag, and MAYBE another pair of shoes that I could get for a lucky bastard deal. Lemme show you what I found. These are strictly handbags...there would have been huge issues if they were shoes.

Let's take this great little bag. It's a canvas bag made by Kidrobot. It looks like those really rad canvas bags that were all the rage when I was in Jr.High. It even comes with a little robot that is attached to the bag. AWESOME, I could buy it and send my kid to school with it. Anyone care to guess how much this great little bag costs??? $98-$128. Wow how much do they think that I am willing to spend to send my kid off in style. The answer...Not much.


Moving on...


Let's see this lovely bag to add to anyones smart dress. Nothing screams what kind of a person you are when you are wearing THIS! This piece of fashion is a design of Stella McCartney. Wearing something you shot is fashion ladies...and its not just the fur anymore! It makes me want to hang mini antlers from my rear view mirror in my car, right next to my dream catcher. Let me tell you what this delight full rag costs...$98. Now who looks like a Deer in Headlights??


I get it, we love Gwen Stefani. Why wouldn't we? She has had 2 kids, and gots the body of Paris after them. People want her hair, abs, ass and they want her clothes. So in the foot steps of Ol' Jenny from the Block(J Lo) she creates L.A.M.B( also the title of her first solo album). This is fashion must but really I don't get it. It's a bunch of color with a latch. This is a clutch bag, HALF a purse really. So why on earth would anybody pay $425? Because LAMB is a 4 letter word in fashion.

I am a house wife who spends her time shopping for her jeans and clothes and low brow places like Khol's, Old Navy...and so on. I do know names and what bags belong to who. This pink mess was made for the 50 year olds who think they are 30 and they spent the money on this bag like they were 20. This sweet Marc Jacobs bag is a pricey $1350, awesome. Good thing you think you can take the money from that money tree in the back yard, ya know the one that you had when you were 20?


Now ya know what all the rage is, it kind of makes the Sex in the City girls bitching about their shoes and their handbags look...retarded. I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but for that price...It better be a hell of a looker for me to be spending that kind of cash.